July 4th

Haven't blogged in a long while.

Tomorrow is the Fourth of July.  Independence Day.

A celebration of freedom. 

This year, me and some of my friends from FUMC Irving

got together to decorate a float.  It is a thing of beauty.

If you get a chance, come by the parade tomorrow in downtown

Irving and check it out.

Happy Fourth to ALL!

God Bless America!

Swine Flu

Anyone else out there concerned about a little pandemic affectionately referred to as the swine flu?  Anything with the word swine in it can't be good.  I don't know about you guys, but I am a little concerned about the judgement of the lady that is in charge of the homeland security bureau.  Wasn't that designed to protect people?  Naw, we should wait till everyone here has it and then close the borders.

The Right to Free Speech....

Okay, let me be the first to say that I hate beauty pagaents.  I think they are completely ridiculous, but I know some people who truly enjoy them and see them as entertaining and even educational.  Now, this is not a blog to bash beauty pagaents.  I just have to say that this whole deal with Miss California and her completely honest answer to Perez-Hilton's question has gotten me worked up.  What a set-up.  What kind of question is that to ask a contestant?  And why would you not want to hear the honest answer?  The poor girl answered in a politically correct way and then added her opinion.  In pre-Obama days, it used to be okay to give your opinion after making a statement.  Now however, not so much.  You are welcome to your opinion as long as it doesn't reflect that of any right wing terrorist extremist view point.  In other words, you are entitled to your opinion as long as it is the left wing (see socialist) liberalist opinion.  Otherwise, keep your mouth shut or we will penalize you.  Welcome to the Obama police state!  

Been Too Long...

I'm baaaaaack!

Later...

Every few months I go through this phase of time where I stay up until all hours of the night.

For the past few nights, I have gone to bed anywhere from 2:30 to 4 or so.

I need to go to bed earlier, but some things I like....

right now I am listening.  Can you hear it?  That's right it is silence punctuated by more silence.  I love that.

I like to sometimes just sit and reflect, this is the only time that I really get to do that, but tonight I am too tired to think about too much ( and thus this completely ridiculous post).  

Anyway, going to bed now...it's almost 2.  Early.

Your Mental Health in a Brave New World...

As a mental health practitioner, I was thrilled to hear of the launch of O's latest hope and change.

The following website:   http://www.samhsa.gov/economy/  was launched to help you prepare yourself for the impending economic doom.  Should you feel like you might kill yourself, if you find yourself crying frequently because O's stimulus package isn't doing it for you, NEVER FEAR O is here to help.  

Here are a few of the tips the website suggests for managing stress:

1. Try to keep things in perspective.  It is all gonna be okay people.  The savior of socialism is here.  

2. Engage in activities like physical exercise, sports or activities.  You know, when you exercise you release endorphins that make you feel good.  If you feel good maybe you won't think of the rat hole our country is sliding down into and you can pretend that it is all gonna be okay.

3. Strengthening connections to your friends and family.  Then you will have more shoulders to cry on when the goverment: a) sucks up the rest of your income in taxes, b) takes over your company and you lose your job, c) takes away all of your consitutional, inalienable rights, and d) sells your soul to China for a world currency.

4. And finally, develop new employment skills.  Why?  Wll, because quite frankly you are gonna need them when you have a bunch of bureaucrats running companies when they have no idea what the hell they are doing.

That about wraps it up for tonight.  I am going to go find some new job skills since counselors are no longer needed...websites can take care of everything in our new world.

So many things, so little time....

Okay, here it is the long awaited blab blog about our falling apart world.  Today, the government fired its first CEO.  Now, this goes against everything that is freedom and democracy.  Read the headlines...I know some of you don't really care if we are democratic.  You think socialism is a better way maybe.  Maybe until we are paying more than half of our paycheck in taxes.  It is time to wake up and it may be too late already.  At the rate we are going, the Grand Ole USA that has been the country of our childhood will not be here, not as we know it anyway.  The Government running companies, the Government spending money by the trillions, the Government censoring the media, the Government taking away our guns, the Government picking "special companies" to be tax free (see not including churches and non-profits that happen to support God), the Government sanctioning the killing of babies (read today that the Government is going to allow 17 year olds to take the morning after pill without parental consent, what the hell is next?), the Government passing the "Fairness" act so the right to free speech is regulated by whether you are liberal or not, our Consititutional rights whithering away before our eyes.  You wanted hope and change, well people, you got it.  One out of two ain't bad, right?  You guess which one I am referring to.  

Ask the people living in "free" Russia how they feel about socialism?  Ask our friend from Waleses dad if he likes socialized medicine while he has his six month wait for his needed heart surgery.  How will you feel when your kid is sick and needs immediate treatment but can't get it because he has to go on a list to wait his turn or your mother dies because she had to wait to long to have surgery?  How about when you decide it is finally time to speak up but there is no one left to listen because they have been effectively silenced by the takeoever of what used to be these free United States?  

There are things that are broken here in our country, but this is not the way to fix it.  This is the way to hurry it along to its ultimate demise.  Maybe we are reaping the wrath of a Holy and Just God for our rebellious, hedonistic lifestyles, our lack of dependence on Him and our selfish desire to meet our every need. 

I have to say though, I still believe in America.  I still believe in freedom.  I still believe in people.  It hasn't been that long since our forefathers shed their blood to purchase the very freedoms being signed away every day by your president.  Is anyone paying attention?

All that being said, I believe in the God of the Universe.  The One who still resides on the dollar bill (that is the US dollar bill not the global united currency or the 666 stamp on the forehead)....the dollar bill that says IN GOD WE TRUST.  What has happened to that Trust??

Make no mistake, HE is still the one and only God!  Liberal or conservative, dark or light, dense or bright, the Bible says that we will all bow before Him one day where every tongue will confess that He is Lord.  It appears that it may be sooner rather than later.  

I am the eternal optimist, but if this ship doesn't get righted soon it is going down.  The truth is glaringly obvious.  Did you ever think it would end this way?  Freedom, I mean?  The dream of democracy?  Where will they go?  You know the poor and huddled masses?  The freedom train will still be rolling, if not on our grounds in our hearts.

Coming Soon.....

I have a lot to say, but unfortunately, I am too tired to say it all tonight.

So, let me just preview that I will be blogging tomorrow about the socialist takeoever of the United States Government.  The stuff we have talked about in the past was kids stuff compared to the "hope" coming out of Washington now.  A government takeover of private companies, banks, etc., global currency suggested by the Chinese and considered by the sec. of treasury, no tax deductions for church donations only places "approved" by the government, no conservative talk radio, no guns, no more freedom, no more grand Ole USA, all of this and we, the people of the United States of America, are just standing by and watching.  What to do?  What to do?

  

Listening

I incline my ear 

to hear just what you are trying to convey

because I am listening.

My mind and heart are attuned to what you are saying,

not always with your words, but what you are saying with your heart and your hurt.

I hear your anger, your frustration, your pain.

I hear your joy, your fears, your gain.

I rejoice with your epiphany,

I silently cry when you've been violated and when you feel like you are nothing at all.

I take it in.

I breathe it in.

I leave it at the foot of the cross.

For I am a just a tiny piece of the puzzle called healing.

I just want you to know that I am listening.

Saturday Morning Blues...

It is 2 a.m.  I am sitting in a hospital room with my grandmother, who has pneumonia.  

She is making me crazy.  Every few minutes she asks if I am asleep.  If I was asleep, I wouldn't be because she won't be quiet!  She needs to be sleeping.  Then she says, I told you to go to sleep.  Ugh!! I am sitting in a very uncomfortable chair.  I have a crummy pillow and  a litle blanket, but I am thinking no sleep is going to be had.  I am gonna try though.  More and better stuff soon....

Why Am I UP?

It is almost 1 a.m.  Why am I up?  I should be sleeping peacefully in my bed having been there for several hours now.  I always find myself back here.  Tired, but awake way past the time I should be.  I used to think when I grew up I would not be a night owl.  I would go to bed at a decent hour and get at least 8 hours and get up early to get things done.  Maybe I haven't grown up yet.  :)

Buy a GUN!!! Support the NRA!

Okay, I am on a rant.  I have decided to purchase a gun.  Now, what makes this shocking is that I am not a "gun" person.  I have never shot anything.  I don't anticipate killing anything.  I hope I do not ever have to use my firearm to protect myself against a criminal attack.  I am not going hunting and I am not planning a coup.  However, I do believe in the constitutional right to bear arms.  This is one of the amendments that makes our country great.  Since we are turning socialist and well-respected pastors are beginning to warn of things that are coming...I have decided that owning a gun and supporting the NRA are some necessary things for the future.  Although there is a debate over the wording of the second amendment it basically states an individual has a right to bear arms to protect and defend the Constitution of these free United States.  O is a socialist and since we may at some point be moving to a police state, it may be a good idea to have a gun.  Now, I know some of you will say I am over the top and have finally completely lost it, but I submit to you...have you been reading the news lately?  A minister was shot and killed in the pulpit on Sunday.  Another crazy went on a spree killing 9 yesterday.  

You may be asking yourself, why has this led you to buy a gun?  Well, I never felt the need to buy a gun before now.  I haven't felt like it was a right that anyone was going to take away.  I have been satisfied up until now with other people having the right to bear arms and me not having to do it.  But, given the precipice we appear to be dangling over, I have decided it is a good idea to exercise my right BEFORE it is taken away and we are all just little lost sheep being led to the slaughter.  

On to the NRA.  Now, have you actually been to the website for the NRA?  This is a membership with some great benefits.  Here is their web link:   http://www.nra.org

I encourage you to join and show support for our second amendment rights.  Become a card carrying member.  Here is what you get for $35.00.  Defense of your 2nd amendment rights, a shooter's cap, NRA magazines, decal and card, insurance for your guns, and the peace of mind that you are a part of protecting what we have always known as home...The Good Ole' United States of America.  Hurry, don't wait or it may be too late!!!

Tuesday Morning....

It is Tuesday morning. 10:40. I am awake.  I am alive.

It must be a good day.

Taliban Moderates...I just couldn't resist!

Okay, really, what is a Taliban Moderate?  Is this a new political party?  

The headlines read, "Obama considers reaching out to Taliban Moderates."  Yeah right. 

These are the people who blew up the towers.  The Pentagon.  Have we forgotten already?

This just seems like an oxymoron to me.

Daylight Savings Time...

Today is the dreaded day of the year where we "Spring Forward!!"  It sounds like a good thing, right?  I hate this day.  I love gaining an extra hour of daylight, but this day is too much.  Why does it always fall on a Sunday.  Why don't they do it on Friday night when most folks can sleep in on Saturday.  I wonder if anyone, besides me, will be in my Sunday school class this morning.  I am doubting it.  We'll see. 

Have a lovely extra hour today.

Signed:  Grouchie!

Don't Go T.O.

Okay, of all the boneheaded moves, why release TO?  I know some of you folks will disagree with me, but really.  This guy is a misunderstood, great football player.  You release a guy when he is not playing well.  You release a guy because he is getting arrested for being stupid or doing wrong, but you don't release a guy who is in the prime of his career.  Jerry has taken a bigger chance on other things.  He has made dumber decisions, but this one may rank up there.  Roy Williams (the receiever, not the safety) didn't prove anything last year.  Come to think of it, Tony Romo didn't prove too much last year either.  He isn't being released.  He is probably the reason TO is.  I wasn't a TO proponent from the beginning, but the more I learned of his story and watched him play, the more I was convinced.  He is the real deal.  Hall of fame.  Selfish, yes, but name me a great football player who doesn't want the ball?  There isn't one.  Distraction, not really.  Demanding and high maintenance, maybe.  Well, I guess we will see on the field next year if this was a good decision or not, but I am not sold.

Reflection One on Hosea

This morning in Sunday School (yes, I finally figured it out), we briefly examined the first chapter of Hosea.  This is an interesting book.  First of all, it is interesting to see that God would ask a mortal man to marry someone unfaithful to illustrate a point. Of course, my jaded mind says we are all unfaithful.  Now some of you will scoff, but it is true.  We are all unfaithful to God at times. Be honest.  How many of us have idols in the high places?  Television, time, sporting events, just what we want to do.  Those are idols.  Anyway, back to Hosea, he was a obedient to God.  He must have known that his obedience would come at a heavy cost.  He married Gomer.  One translation called her an adulterous woman, another a prostitute.  In the first chapter, Gomer bears three children and each one is named by God as a further illustration of Israel's separation from Him.  Can you imagine how Hosea must have felt?  Unfaithful wife and three children, some of whom may not even be his.  Listen to their names: Jezreel (God scatters) - named for a valley where the Israelites shed much blood, Lo-ruhamah (unloved or pitied), and Lo-ammi (Not My People).  Think about it for a minute....very sad.  

Don't we sometimes lament our plight in this life.  Yet, here is Hosea being obedient to God and at the same time sentenced to live a life full of heartache and pain.  I will post more on this study as we go.

This is Sean at the Ash Wednesday service.

I thought it was such a cool photo that I wanted to share it.  Connie Riley, one of the ladies at the church, took this.  

Last year, when Sean lit the bowl of requests, a ball of flames roared up over his head and singed his hair.  It was funny, but scary all at the same time.

Wasting Time...

Today has been an interesting day.  I got up very early.  Went to breakfast with my friend Tonya and then had the great pleasure of being allowed to speak at her church.  Their women's ministry meets on Saturday mornings.  It was a good time of God moving.  

Then I have kind of hung out all day.  I don't get to do that very often.  I surfed the web, messed around on Facebook, and changed the background on my blog.  

Here is my dilemma, it is almost 11 p.m.  I have to teach Sunday school in the morning at 9 and I still do not have a topic or a lesson.  While wasting time is enjoyable and often necessary, it is also, well a waste of time.  Time that I cannot get back and time that is now lost.  Maybe I will remember this moment next time I have time to just throw away, but then again maybe not!

UMMM, THAT WOULD BE A NO!

Well, the letter came today.  The one I had been waiting for.  As I opened the mailbox and pulled it out, I knew without looking that it would be a no.  It was too thin, too small.  I opened it with intrepidation.   "We regret to inform you...."  So, what happens next?  This was the one school I applied to, the one I wanted to go to.  To say that I am disappointed would be an understatement. I know this is supposed to be one of those times when you say, "hey, God has a plan, etc."  To be honest, that is sort of hard right now.  Maybe in the future I will be able to look back and say that, but for now I'm not feeling it.  It has only been a few hours though.  Tomorrow I will get up and the sun will be shining (or not) and my day will progess a little like the one I lived today and then everyday after that.  There will be other PhD programs and jobs and seminars and stuff.  In other words, life will go on.  In the words of Keith Urban, "tonight, I want to cry...." 

Running with the Big Dogs!

Okay, just shot back from Virginia Beach where I went with Brandi to interview for the PhD program.  I don't know about this deal.  I want to get in.  I would like to do research and write books and talk to people about stuff.  Those are my goals, things I like.  Be a better counselor and help other people be better counselors.  I think they want us to be petrified.  No terrified.  I can do this.  Now if I just wait long enough to find out if I got in.

Something Else....

I created this blog in order to write about my thoughts and feelings and to maybe talk about who I am, but you know what, I am finding that difficult.  I am not sure that I want everyone to know. Maybe it is being in a job where I listen to people everyday searching for who they are.  Maybe I have become more private as time has gone on.  Maybe the one topic I don't really want to talk about is me.  Maybe not.  I just think it is interesting.  Somedays I am feeling it and somedays not so much.  My goal is going to be to write something personal at least once a week.  Something deeper than politics and sports.  Who knows, maybe I'll find out something about me that I didn't know.  I'll keep you posted.  :)

Hostile Takeoever...

Ha, you thought I was writing about politics, and I could be.  But, you know what, I am skipping it.  I listened to Rush Limbaugh and Scott Wilder today.  I've had enough.  The hostile takeover I am talking about here is Facebook.  It is amazing.  I joined FB a few weeks back.  I only have 82 friends.  Sean joined reluctantly after I half forced him to....yeah, about a 1000 friends already.  Of course, he is not quite as discriminating about his friends as I am.  Seriously though, I think if anyone wanted to create a hostile takeover all they would need to do is start a grassroots movement on FB.  Come to think about it, maybe they have.....

Confessions of a Parent of a Teenager....

I confess, I remember being a teenager, sort of. Things change. My son Zane is all fire and ice. He loves his momma one moment and he just can't "get us" the next. Frustrating times abound. He is brilliant and challenging and wonderful all at the same time. It is hard as a mother sometimes to know the balance between letting go and holding on. Just watching them grow....

Savi Sweetheart...

Savi is my sweetie. She has a true heart for others. Sometimes that can be hard on her. She hates it when others do not respond to her in a loving manner. I never understand it when one of the kids at school mistreats her, what is not to like? Of course, I am her mother. But, she is almost always upbeat, positive, and encouraging to those around her. God teaches me many lessons through Savannah.

Reflections on Mini-Me....

This is Carly. She is eight. Remember when your parents said, "I hope you have ten just like you!" That is my sweet little Carly. She has spunk and personality and actually is a lot like me. I love all my children and will blog about Zane and Savi soon. Today, I was thinking about Carly. Wondering what she will be like as she gets older. She has some things that I didn't have. She has a better sense of herself than I had at her age. She gets irritated and frustrated when things don't go her way, but she doesn't seem to ever internalize it. I did. I internalized everything. I have gotten a little better. It is interesting to see your children and the snapshots of your own life that they are little parts of.

Read my lips....NO TAXES!!

I think that I may join the political elite this year and not pay my taxes.  I mean, hey, why should I?  No one on Capital Hill seems to be paying theirs.  Why not join them?  How about we start a grassroots movement and follow in the footsteps of Tom Daschle?  Is there some kind of memo that goes out in Washington?  Hey, all you congressmen, why pay taxes on the money you receive from your cushy taxpayer funded job!!  Join us today, we don't pay!! 

If it works for them, why not for us lowly citizens?  Guess what would happen if I really didn't pay?  You would find me in the local jail or spending the rest of my life trying to catch up with what I owe to the IRS.  P.S. O says he screwed up.  Maybe it would have been a good idea to check those things out before he nominated the person.  After all, he was able to procure the private cell phone number of the Arizona Cardinals coach for a little phone call after the game.  It's amazing that no one had access to the tax returns of people being considered for some of the highest offices in our country.  Wonder if O has payed up?

Coming Soon to a Sponsor Near You...

Michael Phelps is an idiot!!  Yes, I actually said it.  Does anyone want to remind this bozo what he has?  8 Gold medals for one.  Not a feat anyone else is likely to tie or break for quite some time.  Now he wants to screw up his chances in the next Olympics by partying like it's 1999.  Hello?  Is anyone home up there?

When the news first broke, all I could think about was seeing his mom in the stands at the Olympics watching all of his races.  Hey mom, could you remind Mike where he came from?  And by the way, Mike, they don't like you for your looks.  

Bailout Smellout...

One of the things us conservatives agree on is less government.  Of course, with O as prez, we are on a freewill binge of bailouts and stimulus.  Big time, big government.  I finally found something that O and I agree on though....Bank of America and their big Super Bowl Bash stinks!

Why should the government give these companies taxpayer money to throw million dollar parties at the SuperBowl?  I know that their defense is that this a money making proposition.  Really?  How many of you ran out to sign up for your Steelers checking account this weekend?  Now, I am all for a big party, but you gotta be kidding me!  800 Large for the tents alone.  That is lots of people's salaries for the year I am thinking.  How soon will it be before they will crying on O's shoulder asking for another handout?  If we really want some thing to be different, we are going to have to see some of these companies willing to make some changes.  No more business as usual.  No more smelly government bailout deals.  Buck up freewheelers! 

Superbowl Rook

There is a new position in football these days.  It is known as the Rook!  They used to be called referees, but their names have been changed.  There is something wrong when the Pittsburgh Steelers have 15 yards in penalties and the Cards have 97 or something.  Seriously, if you lose a game because you suck, well that is one thing.  But if you lose a game because the referees cheat you out of it.  That is another thing.  Maybe the Cards wouldn't have won anyway, but at least one of their scores could be attributed to the refs.  The Cards hung in a played a great game.  Hope Kurt is back next year.  Go Cards!

 

Solar Nails, The Sublime, and the Ridiculous....

I used to think it was a big joke to pay someone to do your nails or give you a pedicure or wax your eyebrows, or whatever other crazy thing we women do in the name of beauty.  As I have aged, I have submitted myself more and more to the process of the sublime and the ridiculous.  I get my haircut every 4 weeks (like clock work), colored when it becomes to much my new shade (can you say completely GRAY through and through!!!!) and when money and time allow I go to CoCo Nails and get a pedicure and have my nails done.  They love me there and let me tell you why.  I  don't understand a word they say and I am not picky about what is done to me (never have been and mostly because when God was passing out the femininity genes, I only got one!).  Over the years, I have let various friends that I trust or were being blackmailed by drag me off to various places to go through wacky beauty rituals.  The latest is Tina, the pedicure lady at CoCo nails.  She is incredible.  It is not just her random singing in Vietnamese or whatever obscure Asian country she hails from, it is her complete ability to disassociate from you and the world and still manage to scrape, scrub, trim, paint, and massage your feet and legs.  I have never seen anything or anyone like it.  I'd pay a million dollars for her.  She takes my yucky pedestrians (that is feet for those of you who are wondering and yes, I commit the foot sin of walking barefoot without socks - don't tell anyone) and in a mere hour or so transforms them into dainty (yes, can you imagine) baby soft beautiful feet.  I am amazed.  I always forget that all the nerve endings in my body seem to be located on the bottom of my feet, but after a brief interlude where my  body leaves earth for a few moments, I find myself back in the spa chair actually enjoying her otherwordly ministrations to my tootsies.  I swear today she sang and played this little piggy with my toes in her foreign tongue.  My nails are done too.  Today Kim, my nail lady said, "I give you solar nails, they pretty."  I say, "Hey, okay fabulous."  I think they are slowly working me up to the big time!!  

Anyway, I understand the fuss now.  When I drive away, there is something so feminine about having painted toenails and french tips!!  I love it.  I guess getting older has some plusses.  

 

The Rythm of the Blues...

I didn't sleep at all last night.  I couldn't sleep and for no reason at all I felt my melancholy self slipping up and out.  I am not sure what I felt sad about, but I felt sad.  Sometimes the blues have a rythm all their own and they just take ahold.  So, I laid there all night thinking about everything and nothing.  I finally got up about 6 something.  No point laying there any longer when you're wide awake.  I'll have to see what rythm today takes....

Late Night Ramblings...

Every few months or so, I go on this late night binge.  I stay up later and later for days until I can't do it anymore.  Then I have a headache and then I start to be normal again.  Tonight is a late night.  Everyone is in bed already.  I am listening to the sounds.  There was a train horn off in the distance.  The dryer is making it's noise.  The heat just came on.  The dogs are barking, probably at a possum.  I heard a window creak.  there is something else...oh yeah, it's silence.  Wow!  It doesn't happen, but every so often it is nice to hear the sound of nothing.  Sometimes it is cool to just watch someone you love sleeping.  Sometimes the children.  They look so innocent like that and I wonder at how fast they have grown.  I think about how they will be gone before I know it.  What will they look like then.  I hear their deep regular breathing patterns and  think about how much I will miss them, but I also look forward to seeing what and who they become.  I say a little prayer for each of them.  A bit philosophical.  The heat just turned off.  It really has quite a hum.  Now there isn't much sound.  I see some books I would like to read.  Should have been doing that rather than surfing.  The dogs have stopped barking.   Guess the possum ran off.  My eyes are getting heavy, after all it has been a long day.   I think I hear something....it is my pillow beckoning me to come and lay down.  My blanket may have spoken as well and I am off.  I used to think sleeping was a waste of time, now I know better.

G'night!

What about WAR?

I was thinking about something someone challenged me on earlier this week about war.   I think the word of God alludes to the fact that there will be wars and rumors of wars until the end of time.  War is not pleasant.  It is not desirable, but is it inevitable?  At times, I believe it is.  Is it justified?  At times, I believe it is.  People don't like war.  We don't like death or killing or negativity for that matter.  Not that we should like it.  However, if you read the Old Testament, you will see that there were times that God sent His people into battle.  He commanded them at times to wipe out entire people groups.  Sometimes when God made commandments like those it is hard for us to understand.  Another interesting note about those commands is what occured when His people didn't do what He had said.  When whatever group He had commanded be wiped out wasn't, they always came back to terrorize and hurt His people, the Israelites. 

If there weren't wars sometimes, there wouldn't be freedom.  Freedom for us to write these blogs and to agree or disagree about certain issues or worship in whatever church we choose each weekend.  For some there wouldn't be life.  Sometimes war is the only option.  

I don't want to get so far gone that I condemn the very thing that allows me to enjoy the freedoms of life that I have.  Just some thoughts....I will have to finish this later.

The Problem with Pain

It is midnight.  I just got home from teaching a class.  (The class went well by the way, but that is not the focus of this particular blog).  Okay, I am having problems with my teeth.  I got a large amount of work done before Christmas and nothing has been the same since then.  The original issue with this one particular tooth wasn't really addressed and so here I am writing to you in excruciating, and I mean excruciating pain.  

Pain is a problem, you know?  When your jaw is hurting so bad that you can barely focus on what you are thinking, it is too much.  Pain tonight - a 20 on a scale of 1 to 10.  I have to go get this things fixed.  The advil isn't working too much anymore and I am not going to be able to tough it out.   More in the morning!  Man, I hope I can sleep!

SNOW DAY!!!!!

When I was a kid, I loved a snow day.  We used to all get "stuck" over at my friend Bev's house.  We would stay a couple of days eating, playing games, watching movies, and just talking and joking around.  Those were fun days.  Now, snow days aren't as much fun because they mean there is work to be done and it will have to be done somehow regardless of the icy conditions.  :(  

I still love to hear the sound of the sleet coming down and early before the dawn looking at the pristine white that covers the ground and the rooftops.  A snowflake (which we didn't see last night) is one of God's wonderous creations and always reminds me of how we are each created unique and different and yet somehow the same.  Maybe I still do love a snow day!

 

We need a Savior....

You know, something occurred to me this morning.  Our world needs a Savior.  We always have and now is no different.  However, remember the Israelites.  They had God.  He talked and interacted with them in different ways, just as He does us.  But, they wanted a Savior.  So, they looked around and all the other peoples (peoples who did not know the One True God) had a king.  In response, they clamored for a king.  God had a plan to send the King of kings.  But, they didn't want to wait for God's plan.  They wanted a king right then.  God said, "okay.   I'll give you a king."  The trouble starts when we try to fill our inner need for a Savior with a mere human being.  Kind of like now.

   

16 Random Things About Me...

I have decided to abandon politics for a while.  My blood pressure has been going up (just kidding)!   It is great to be able to vent my frustrations and still be able to sleep at nigth (at least for now) knowing that I will wake up tomorrow and be okay.  

Anyway, I found an old friend on FB the other night and she had been challenged to write 16 random things about herself.  I liked the idea, so here goes....

1.  I remember being born.  I know it sounds crazy, but I have some vague early memories of some things.  I will share them with anyone who personally wants to know, but not on here for everyone because they will haul me off and put me in  padded room.  An extra note, my mom said when I was about six, I told here that I remembered this.  She said she asked me, "What do you remember?"  I replied, "I remember falling down, down, down from the dark into the light." Just saying...

2.  My dad and I were never close.  My earliest memories (after being born of course) are of him and my mom having their last big fight.  It was not pretty.  However, he died two years ago and truthfully, I will never get over it.  I was really mad at first.  Not so much now.  But, there were lots of things that I wanted to say to him and many things I wanted to hear him say.  One of my friends and I had had a conversation about talking to your dad before it was too late.  I missed this one.

3.  I love London.  It is the only city I have ever been to that "felt" like home.  The air, the people, the buildings.  I don't know how to describe it, but there was something magical about it for me.  

4.  The thing that makes number three the most interesting is that I have never felt a sense of belonging almost anywhere.  I have always had a wandering spirit.  I trace this back to number 2, not being close to my dad.  

5.  I love speed.  I should have been a race car driver.

6.  I love the stage.  There is nothing like performing a song, giving a speech, teaching a class, preaching.  Love it.  

7.  I love the mountains AND the beach.  The perfect day is getting up and smelling the fresh mountain air, catching the sunrise over the largest peak, or seeing some of God's creatures grazing near a mountain lake.  The perfect day is walking along the beach, picking up shells, wading in the mysterious waters, feeling the sting of salty air against your face and smelling it later in your hair.  :)

8.  One of my goals in life is to visit all 50 states.  I have hit 23 already.  Gotta work on the rest!

9.  When I was a kid, I collected tshirts from anywhere and everywhere.  I think at some point I had about 300 or so.  I wonder what happened to those things?

10.  When I commit to something, I do so with all my heart.  (even though I like the pressure of working on stuff at the last minute, my brain is already there)  Some would say I am extreme.  Maybe that is true.

11.  Most people see me as extremely (there is that word again) confident, but people who really know me know that I struggle with insecurities about important things, like who I am and my intelligence level.  I used to worry about whether I was really saved or not and whether I would really know if I was or not.  Glad I'm past that. 

12.  I have a keen sense of justice.  Sean taught me that justice must always be balanced with mercy.  I am still learning.

13.  I think my job is the best one in the world.  I get to listen to people's problems and watch their growth and healing.  Although there are some rough days in this, the good days make it all worthwhile.  When someone "gets" it, has a catharsis, makes a breakthrough, thinks a little differently, that is the greatest thing in the world and being a part of that is awesome.  I also love to teach!

14.  I am a night owl and a morning person.  When I was younger, I hated mornings, but somewhere along the road I began to love being the first one up and out.  I'm not saying I want to do that everyday.  The coolest thing though is being outside when the sun first starts to cross the horizon.  I also like being the last one to bed every night.  I know, I am an enigma.

15.  I have always loved the movies.  I could go to a movie almost every night.  My tastes are a bit more discriminating as I have aged, which is probably a good thing!

16.  I used to be afraid of dying.  I am not so much anymore, although I am not quite ready to go yet.  As I age,  I think about it more and more.  Isn't that strange?  Not like I am obsessed with it or anything, but I wonder about it.  Like how will it happen?  How old will I be?  Why did my dad die at 60?  The irony of his 80 year old mother dying six months before he did.  Will I make it past that?  Will I have accomplished the things that God created me for?  When I was a kid, I used to sit in the dark in my room and ponder the deep questions of life, "who am I" and "what is my purpose?"  I guess some things never change.   

I think I will do this again in a month or two!  Kind of interesting.  What are yours?

Whatever happened to FREEDOM OF SPEECH?

I really wanted to get off of politics, but I couldn't do it tonight!  The last time I checked this was still free America.  Did something change recently?  I know O said change, but is this what he meant?  I just read an article by CBS news about the Democrats circulating angry petitions against Rush Limbaugh.  Excuse me?  First of all, Rush has been misquoted in the whole "I want Obama to fail" comment.  But, even if he had said that, isn't that his right as an American citizen? One reader commented (and I must agree), "the first step of a new socialist regime is to silence the media."  People, we ought to be really scared.  

The first amendment says, "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise therof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or of the right of people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."  There are two biggies here.  The first is the right to free speech.  The second is the right of the press to speak.  We don't have to agree, but everyone is entitled to their opinion.  When we take that away, we are no longer America.  We are no longer the country our forefathers fought for.  The media crucified Bush for eight years.  They made fun of him.  They wished him dead.  They made bad movies about him.  I am an American.  I do not wish harm to my president, however, I do not agree with his policies.  He talks about hope and change.  My hope is that he doesn't change my country, my government, into something that is unrecognizable.  It all starts with the freedom of speech.  What's next?

Rewind

Okay, one second after I posted my last post, I read that O had decided that it wasn't such a good idea to use a trillion dollars to purchase birth control for poor folks.  The Republicans might have actually had a good idea when they criticized that whole plan.  Of course, O will probably make the idea his own.  I guess it doesn't matter.  We need some changes, but don't need stupidity!

Stay tuned for the first 100 days with me....

The Economy Saved By Birth Control?

Amazing.  In an enlightening interview, Nancy Pelosi told George "CryBaby" Stephanopolous that it was not really B. Hussein Obama that would save our economy, but rather our overwhelming financial investment in birth control.  Yes friends, it seems that family planning has become the business of the Federal Government.  The goal is to keep you from having too many children which in turn will keep our economy from totally hitting bottom.  Of course, what they aren't telling you...we have already hit bottom.  China owns us and O's trillion dollar financial stimilus plan is not going to stimulate much.  People are losing their jobs left and right.  But, we all know that Dubya is single-handedly responsible for the war, the economy, and the people starving on Mars.  Okay, enough of my ranting for today.  Does anyone but me sense the irony in everyday since O took office? 

New Baby

Today is Saturday!  I am grateful for a day to call my own.  I do not have to go to work anywhere!  I like that.  We just got back from going to see my new nephew, Alexander Judge Bogart.  This child has got natural blond highlights in his full head of dark hair.  I have never seen anything like it.  He is very cute.  We are thankful that he arrived here safely and welcome him to the family. 

Now see, I was going to write another Nobama message, but I decided to give it a rest for today.   He's been giving me lots to write about though!!  :)  Have a great weekend y'all!

Conscientious Objector

I have decided that for the next four years I am going to become a conscientious objector to the status of the nation.  I know many will not agree with me and that is okay.  Last time I checked this was still the United States of America and we both have a right to our opinions.  For as long as I have been able, I have cast my vote.  If you voted, you have a right to an opinion.  Another blog for another day is for those who complain and yet do not vote and in my opinion have no voice.  However, for today, I must say that I am disappointed.  I will respect the office of president, even if I do not agree with its occupant.  I was raised in a time when you had respect for the highest office in the nation.  (Very classy those of you who sang na, na, na, na to the former President Bush yesterday.  Great message!).  Anyway, my objection to this new president is not based on his color.  I am celebratory, as are many of my friends, to see the dawn of a new day of race relations in my country.  I have no problem with an African American president.  I have a problem with this guys beliefs.  Does anyone but me smell socialism?  As I expressed my concerns, one of my friends patted my hand and said, "well, you are a Christian.  You must pray."  Yes, I must pray.  I must pray for a man who claims the same label and yet supports partial birth abortion and numerous other things that I struggle to accept from a Biblical standpoint.  

We live in a postmodern world.  One that claims that absolute truth does not exist and that everyone creates their own reality.  In spite of this, there is a Savior (and the world only has room for one Savior by the way and He will return one day, but not in the form of Barack Obama).  The problem with this current attitude is that Christians are getting to the place where they do not have a right to stand up for what is right.  But, someone must!  There must be some healthy skepticism.  There must be someone who realizes what is behind the promise of hope and change.  This is how my conscientious objector status fits into the now.  I do not object to war, but I morally object to the stance of the current regime.  For now, I still have the freedom and the right to object.  There is a day coming when I will not have that right.  For all of you who disagree, I have a thougth for you.   Matthew 16:26 says, "what good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul?"  I leave you with this...we must count the cost!

TGIF

Thank God it's Friday!  I am looking forward to a restful weekend. 

Today my class got into a rousing discussion (read mild shouting match) about the idea of prenuptual agreements.  We were equally divided between the two sides, one believing that a prenup showed a lack of trust.  The second side that it was necessary because people have a right to protect their interests.  Showing a lack of trust.  Right?  It was interesting.  Of course, the trust side was the younger part of the class and the second side was older and have experienced more problems.  So, what do you think?  Prenup or not?  Do you go into a marriage to protect your interests?  Or do you trust God to take care of you even when people change and disaster happens?  Something to think about. 

Almost home....

Well, it is Thursday.  I am sitting in class watching my students listening to a Dave Ramsey CD and hoping lunch time arrives soon.  I woke up at 4:30 this morning.  I couldn't go back to sleep, but I bet I could right now.  In this CD, Dave Ramsey just said one day the Crocodile Hunter was gonna get it.  If he did, he would have to go back and edit this CD.  How is that for foreshadowing?  Anyway, we are almost home.  What have I learned this week?

For one, it is better to be prepared for something.  I took on this class at the last minute.  I know it could be better.  I've learned I can hold my own with whatever.  There have been some challenges.  It helps me to think on my feet.  My brain is still working.  Good to know.

We are talking about finances in marriage, singles, and single parenting today.  Running the gamut.  I am glad to be almost home.

Salvation....

Okay, so my supervisor at my job calls on Monday around 10 and says, "Hey, we have a class going on and it started at 8 and the teacher didn't show up and we can't get ahold of him and it's an emergency and we need someone, is there any way that you can would be willing to do this?"  SO, with my savior mentality, I say, "Yeah, sure! No problem."  Anyway, here I am teaching this marriage and family class.  At moments, it is a complete beatdown.  I am tired.  I wasn't prepared totally (given the time frame with which I was given to prepare.)  And these students are giving me the business every chance they get.  They challenge everything I think and say and give them.  Now, this is not necessarily a bad thing because they learn from this, but when you are tired and barely prepared and all then it is a bit more difficult to deal with.  I am wondering today if maybe I am the one that needs salvation.  :) 

Job's Wife

This morning, my Sunday School lesson was on Job's wife.  We have been studying the women of the Bible.  We started in Genesis last January and reached Job this morning.  Anyway, I wasn't sure how to teach a lesson over a woman who has about 1 sentence in the Bible.  I knew that I didn't want it to be negative.  You see, I think traditionally Job's wife has been viewed in a very negative way.  However, I think if anyone of us lost our ten children to calamity add in our house and our livelihood, we would probably respond more in the way Job's wife did.  The Bible says that Job was a righteous and blameless man.  It does not extend the same courtesy to his wife.  The truth is she was more human.  Just like most of us!  These two lines actually opened the door for some amazing conversation in my class and some deep thought by myself.  Someone asked me is it okay to be angry?  My reply...yes, it is okay to be angry but it is not okay to sit in it until it becomes bitterness.  I have done this myself.  There are a few things that I have remained bitter over.  I need to be working on those.  So, for whoever stumbles across this and spends the time reading it, I would encourage you to examine your heart.  Is there some pockets of anger that have sat to long and become bitterness?  It is time to forgive.

And that is a post for another day.  I am praying for you as you pray for me!

I am...

I don't have time to write too much in here tonight.  I am trying to write a final exam for my multicultural class today.  I am posting a poem that comes out of an exercise I made my class to today.  It is an "I am..." poem.

I am a professional counselor - I will listen but not always have an answer

I am a teacher - I pass on information 

I am a wife - married for life

I am a mother - my children are the blooms of life

I am a friend - loyal to the end

I am music - it comes from my soul

I am complicated - what you see is not always what you get

I am a sinner - thankfully redeemed

I am a believer - this I know, Jesus died for me and for you

I am words - but I cannot always tell you how I feel or what I think

I am me - take it or leave it. 

Hot Topics

So, I changed my mind.....I'm baaaack!

My class had a rousing discussion today about gay marriage.  You know, besides the whole spiritual issue (which is a big deal!) there are a few other things to consider when pondering the whole gay marriage thing.  For one, what will come about after gay marriage is made legal?  If marriage is one person + one person, which is something I saw written the other day, then what defines the one person?  What if that one person is a child?  Will we begin to argue over that next?  The whole post modern thought that anything is okay for any given individual is very pervasive in our society.  My point here is that what will stop this issue at homosexuals marrying?  I am not a hater, just wondering what will become of an institution that has stood the test of time.  Things that have been redefined often get so distorted that it is difficult to recognize them anymore.  Enough for today!  Have a good one!

Monday/ Monday

Back when I was working on my undergrad degree, you had to go to class several times a week for a full semster.  Times have changed.  This week I am teaching a January mini.  This a class that meets for five days, eight hours a day, one week.  Full credit.  Lots of lecturing done by moi.  That is lots of talking.  I try to make it as interesting as possible, but hey, I am no miracle worker.  I am tired and this is only day one.  It will be interesting to see how the rest of the week goes.  It may be a while before I write in here again.  So, until then, have a lovely week.

H

Seven Pounds

Seven Pounds is an interesting movie about redemption.  Will Smith is great in the role of Ben Turner.  He plays grief well.  I don't want to give any plot away, but there were several spiritual questions to wrestle with, ultimately, life and death should not be in our hands.

Jan. 2

Nothing much special about today.  It is the last day of the holiday for children around the country.  I decided to take mine to see ICE! at the Gaylord hotel.  Great exhibit, much better than last year.  Brrrr. Cold!  Going to see 7 pounds tonight.  I'll let you know how it was tomorrow.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I can't believe it is 2009.  I am feeling quite introspective today.  Everyone always has resolutions, here are mine:

1. Lose weight (isn't that on 99% of peoples lists?)

2. Read the Bible and spend time with God in relationship every day.

3. Start working on my PhD. 

4. Read more books, just because.

5. Learn a new word everyday.

Okay, that is enough for now.  May anyone who passes this way have a blessed New Year!

Talk to yous oon.